At the Moment: Entrepreneurship Metaphor

If an entrepreneur were described as someone who is “improvisational, quick, clever, resourceful, and inventive,” then I would never consider myself an entrepreneur. However, I recently read the following metaphor, which made me consider the possibility of there being an entrepreneur inside all of us.

“Perhaps the game of golf, more than any other, replicates the complex and dynamic nature of managing risk and reward, including all the intricate mental challenges faced in entrepreneuring. No other sport, at one time, demands so much physically, is so complex, intricate, and delicate, and is simultaneously so rewarding and punishing; and none tests one’s will, patience, self-discipline, and self control life golf.”[1]

Word! When I read the above I seriously felt it was written with me in mind. “Rewarding and punishing.” Perfect. I have hardly played golf this summer but when I did, it invoked such satisfaction, especially when the ball went in the desired direction. :-) I also felt the same way when I took cello lessons last fall. Activities such as golf, cello, and countless others, almost require you to have an obsession to be successful. I now suppose the question is, “What I am passionate about?”

Best,
Hadley

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[1] 7.Entrepreneurial Mind in Thought and Action: from New Venture Creation: Entrepreneurship for the 21^st Centruy, 6/e by Timmons et al. 26

At the Moment: Mentorship Programs: Part I

I work with talented people at OptumHealth, a UnitedHealth Group company. Three people, in particular – Chengny Thao (who is leaving us, boo!), Cara Troye (my former boss), and Wendy Mateega (who sat directly across from me in our cubefarm) – inspired this topic (brief Part I) about mentorship programs. Each has influenced my experience in seeking and establishing a mentor as well as wanting to share the wealth with others. Chengny is the one who suggested I obtain a mentor. Cara was my boss who interviewed prospective mentors and made the first contact with my mentor. And Wendy has talked about establishing a formal mentorship program within her department at OptumHealth with the hopes of extending it throughout all of OptumHealth and eventually the other UnitedHealth Group businesses. (Okay, I may have thrown in that last bit about going UHG-wide, so I may have unofficially expanded the scope of Wendy’s plan. One may already exist but I have yet to hear about it.)

Anyhow, Part I of this blog post subject is me actually asking you to share your thoughts and experiences on mentoring/ship programs. As I recently expanded my role at work to include the management of a small team, I now find myself accountable for more than just me. It is in my interest to help develop these team members and when I think back to what has been successful for me at work, my relationship with my mentor and those relationships which were derived from my primary mentor relationship have been invaluable. In fact, I even proposed establishing a membership program (perhaps very informally at first) with my interim boss and she has asked me to present best practices and benefits at her next management meeting. I am not sure how a bunch of IT managers and analysts will respond to a mentorship program but it is a start. So, I ask for your input, articles, links, etc. to share with us. It would be greatly appreciated.

Best,
Hadley

At the Moment: Back to Board and Volunteering: Part II

Excellent news! Three blog posts ago I shared my feelings on board service and volunteering and since then two fabulous things have happened: (1) wingwoman Kathryn Frankson signed up to volunteer for Big Brothers Big Sisters and (2) I received word that starting in July I will be a part of the Marketing & Communications Committee of Tempo, the young professionals group of the Minnesota Opera. Directorship will have to come at a later time, one which I will have to earn!

Anyhow, if not for the enjoyment of opera, I love the idea of helping the Minnesota Opera cultivate new audience members – especially as the existing audience grays – yet ensuring that it stays true to its artistic mission. I realize that a lot of people have assumptions about opera: high ticket prices; a lack of understanding because it is sung in foreign languages; and a lack of familiarity with storylines, music, and performers. However, you can address these issues by purchasing less expensive seats, knowing which opera companies display subtitles in English, and doing some preliminary light reading, respectively. If you think about it, an opera is essentially a play set to music. :-)

But what I look forward to in this volunteer role is how to market to the audience/consumers, donors, volunteers, membership groups, and recognize the complexity of overlapping stakeholders and addressing their needs and interests ... to understand what is important to them and communicate our value proposition in exchange for their time. Operas can be as long as 2.5 to 3 hours, however, from my experience, it is worth it! But if you must, I suggest starting off with an opera that has popular music and a fast-paced storyline like "La bohème," which is absolutely beautiful.

Anyhow, see below for more blogs/articles on board service and volunteering:

Board Life Matters
BoardSource's "What I should know before joining a board?"
Metro Magazine's "6 Reasons to Join a Twin Cities Board of Directors"

Best,
Hadley

At the Moment: Total Money Makeover - Baby Step 1

Give me a goal that I believe in and it will be so tangible to me that I cannot even imagine not attaining it. (I realize that this behavior of mine is taxing for some of my friends, alas.) My No. 1 goal for 2010 has been to have a healthy financial physique and I am achieving that goal with the help of Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover. As I said in my first blog post, Mr. Ramsey's Total Money Makeover (TMM) program has changed my paradigm in managing my personal finances – the seven baby steps are pragmatic and easy to commit to. TMM may not be for everyone but I can honestly say that since I committed myself to this program I have not been stressed financially once this year.

In Baby Step 1, Mr. Ramsey tells us on his website to build a $1,000 emergency fund:

"An emergency fund is for those unexpected events in life that you can't plan for: the loss of a job, an unexpected pregnancy, a faulty car transmission, and the list goes on and on. It's not a matter of if these events will happen; it's simply a matter of when they will happen.

This beginning emergency fund will keep life's little Murphies from turning into new debt while you work off the old debt. If a real emergency happens, you can handle it with your emergency fund. No more borrowing. It's time to break the cycle of debt!"

In January 2010, I put $1,000 into a money market account because I knew that if the money sat in my checking account I would have spent it. (Just being honest.) A money market account allowed the money to be readily available in the case of an emergency, and lucky for me I had already completed Baby Step 1 because just the other week in April I encountered an emergency.

When I took my car in for its annual oil change, the service adviser was shocked to see that my 2006 car with 32,000 miles had tires that were completely bald. Sadly, this was not a surprise to me. I live in Minnesota and drive a rear-wheel car without the optional AWD, snow tires, and have an upward-sloping driveway. I know. Please. Anyhow, road safety was my primary concern, so new tires that day were a must! I paid for the new tires with cash. It did not even occur to me to charge them. This confirmed that TMM was the right personal financial plan for me. To financial peace! (I have since replenished the once depleted emergency fund. Thanks, Geithner.)

Best,
Hadley

At the Moment: March for Babies

The blog post for this week was going to be a follow-up to last week's post, Back to Boards, and specifically address the involvement of Generation Xers and Yers in regards to board service; however, I just returned from the March of Babies walk, a fundraising event for the March of Dimes, and I wanted to briefly touch on the experience.

First, I overtly thank all of you who supported my participation in honor of my darling twin nieces, Lucia (pronounced "lu-see-a") and Amelia, who were born two months premature. (By the way, my posts on supporters' Facebook walls do not count as my official "thank you.") Because of people's generosity, I raised $1,825! This is a success for me considering my original goal was $500, and the first and last time I participated in such a fundraising event was at the Alzheimer's Association Memory Walk 2003 when I raised $1,260.

Second, as just mentioned above, I do not generally participate in these types of fundraising events but a week after I returned from New York City last month when I met L&A for the first time, my company sent out an email recruiting employees to participate in the March for Babies walk. I took the timing of the communication as a sign for me to register.

Third, the event seemed very well-attended but I must admit, I was a little overwhelmed with all the people, strollers, and dogs. I guess working predominately from home has taken its toll on my once-developed social skills. :-) Anyhoo, the walk in the brisk air took about 70 minutes but it felt good to support the March of Dimes. To babies!

And fourth, there is nothing more satisfying after a baby walk like brunch with a Bloody Mary followed by a strawberry cosmo! I so desperately wanted the lemon-ricotta hotcakes but my dairy-free diet does not tolerate such brilliance. Alas.

So anyhoo, now that I am back on the community service wagon, I have been thinking about which fundraiser I shall participate in next year. I need something bigger. The answer: the Red Ribbon Ride! This commitment is 100% inspired by my dear friend A.J. Bates (the partner of Irvin, who I have introduced to you before – happy 10 year anniversary guys!) who has participated in AIDS/LifeCycle since 2000. AIDS/LifeCycle is a seven-day bike ride from San Francisco to Los Angeles. Oy! The Red Ribbon Ride is only four days in Minnesota – whew! But I will most definitely need the upcoming year to prepare mentally and physically. Perhaps I should start by attending a spinning class – better yet – how about I first buy a bike?! Ha!

Best,
Hadley

At the Moment: Back to Boards

… or at the very least, back to volunteering. My sabbatical from volunteering ends this year. When I look around, I see volunteer opportunities all around. When I moved to Minneapolis I told myself I would just focus on work, school, and nesting and I would resume volunteering after I graduated. I wanted to make sure the variables in my life were receiving the best of me. But graduation is in approximately four months, so the life where I thought I had no time has no more excuses.

Quite frankly, though, there was always time to serve on a board or volunteer but it was not a priority. I spent my downtime watching television, which just made me fat. But when I canceled my cable last winter and started thinking about things that were intrinsically satisfying, I thought about how much I enjoyed board service and volunteering. I also was reminded that as an educated person, it was my responsibility to give back to the community, which could come in the form of working for a nonprofit, raising a family, or as we are discussing, volunteering. Volunteering was always an opportunity to network, meet fabulous people who shared a common interest, and where I learned new skills. Do not get me wrong, though, I strive to donate 10% of my take-home salary but realistically these days it is around 4%. Giving money is a privilege but giving time is an honor.

But you may be asking, “How does one get involved in board service?” I have to admit that my board service experience fell into my lap. When I lived in my hometown of St. Louis, I was asked to join the young professional boards of membership groups at the Alzheimer’s Association and the United Way of Greater St. Louis. This is not always the case and sometimes it takes an increase of involvement with membership groups before being asked to join.

In my opinion, the most effective board service occurs when you genuinely resonate with a cause, a political, social, or cultural organization; can bring needed expertise or insight to the board; and are committed with your time and responsibilities. Last month when I started thinking about a certain cultural organization that I was really interested in volunteering for in a board or committee capacity, I consulted with my friend Robin Gillette, executive director of the Minnesota Fringe Festival, and she said, “You’re smart to pick board service in an area you love.” Apparently my emerging passion for the Minnesota Opera and its young professionals group, Tempo, was evident. But the verdict is still out on whether or not and how I will be volunteering for Tempo.

So, while you think about how to incorporate volunteerism into your life, know that there are several organizations that would welcome your experience, insight, and relationships. But select an organization that is important to you. I prefer to focus on one to three organizations rather than spreading myself too thin, especially because board service usually requires time and possibly fundraising, and I do not want to dilute the level of my commitment.

Now, if you need help figuring out what type of organization to volunteer for, click here for some fun ideas about volunteering by your Zodiac sign. Oh, and did I mention that this is National Volunteer Week?! :-)

Best,
Hadley

P.S. -- The above March for Babies badge is actually my walker page for this Sunday, April 25, 2010 come rain or shine or snow!

At the Moment: All About My Name

I just returned from a long weekend in New York City, where I had the pleasure of reuniting with friends from undergrad and those from St. Louis, who had moved there. I also met several delightful people who I hope to see again. I met my new and darling twin nieces and fed and unsuccessfully burped one of them.

I ate at Michelin starred restaurants Perry Street and Rouge Tomate, both which were delicious. I saw “West Side Story” on Broadway, my first time in Times Square. And I saw an outstanding dance performance by KEIGWIN + Company.

I may have overcompensated in activities for my eleven and a half year absence since this was my first real visit to the city since I moved away on August 20, 1999. A lot of memories came back to me including the history of my name. The following is that history. I figured it was time to get everyone on the same page.


Srisak Veggabul, 1975 – 1976
On September 11, 1975, I was born in an orphanage in Thailand. I remember at one point my (adoptive) mother told me that it was rumored that my biological father was a cop and my biological mother was a grad student from up-country Thailand. I was given the name Srisak Veggabul (to my understanding it was pronounced “See-sok Wech-a-boon”). I believe all of us orphans were given the last name of Veggabul either because that was the last name of the lady who ran the orphanage, the doctor who delivered us, or maybe it was for both reasons – sadly, I do not recall what my mother told me because I do not always do a good job at listening. :-)

Anyhow, I lived in the orphanage for six months before my paternal grandmother, Gram (a.k.a., Dorothy Wilson), visited my maternal aunt, Suchada Holmes, and grandmother, Yai (rhymes with “lie” and means grandmother in Thai). During Gram’s visit my parents had asked that Gram go to the orphanage to inquire about the adoption process. So, Gram went to the orphanage and unbeknownst to them all, was able to choose me right then and there. Gram said she chose me because I was the “longest baby in the orphanage” and she wanted to make sure I would fit in well back in the United States.


Brian Wilson, 1976 – 1998
In 1976, I was legally adopted by Peter and Pun Wilson in the United States and given the name Brian Wilson. I grew up my entire life with references to the Beach Boy Brian Wilson: “You don’t look like Brian Wilson” or “How’s Carnie?” But none of this made me think to change my name.

It was then in the fall of 1998 that my dear friend Peter Nguyen asked me what my initials were because he needed them for the monogrammed business card holder that he gave me as a graduation gift.

“B.W.,” I told him.
“What’s your middle initial?” he asked.
“I don’t a have one,” I replied.
“I guess they can monogram it with just B.W.”
“No, they can’t!” I quickly responded. “Give me a week! I’ll find a middle name!”


B. Hadley Wilson, 1998 – 2006
So for one week I researched names. The first thing I did was see how each letter looked straight forward, i.e., BHW, and then in an actual monogram format, i.e., BWH. But before selecting H, I had narrowed it down to G and D. So from there, I researched the meanings of names or found names that I thought sounded good with Brian and Wilson. By midweek I came up with Greer and Dean. I actually thought Greer was kind of cool for a middle name and I told another friend about Greer and she said, “No, you can’t use Greer. That was the name of that strange model I hooked up with.” Ha! So, I scratched that one and chose Dean.

However, before I committed to Dean, I sent an email to the Brian Wilson fan club and asked if Brian Wilson’s middle name was Dean and that I was hoping it was not because I wanted to differentiate our names. The president of the fan club replied and said, “It’s not Dean but close, it’s Douglas.” Well, here was an opportunity for me to end the Beach Boy jokes but with Dean our initials would have stayed the same, so I called Peter Nguyen and told him I needed another week to find a middle name.

So, the search continued until I found Hadley. It was also during this time that my schoolmates and I were researching prospective employers and providing feedback on each others’ resumes. I had changed my resume from Brian Wilson to Brian H. Wilson and my friends kept asking what the H stood for, so I told them and they all said they liked Hadley. So in 1998, I changed all my information to B. Hadley Wilson and started using Hadley as my primary name.


S. B. Hadley Wilson, 2006 – Present
After my mother passed away in 2005, I felt that I owed it to her to become more engaged with my Thai heritage. I thought about taking Thai lessons but that was just too much of a commitment for me. So, in the summer of 2005, I decided that I would integrate Srisak back into my name. I played around with the four names. Such combinations included B. S. Hadley Wilson – you can imagine my own reaction to that one – and B. Hadley S. Wilson, which looked weird to me. By the end of summer, I finally decided that Srisak should come first since it was my given name.

So, a year later, I finally got around to submitting the name change request forms to the St. Louis courts where they reviewed it, filed it, and told me to come back to appear in front of a judge. They provided two dates for me to choose from to appear in court and the first date was September 11, 2006, which was my birthday, so I knew it was a sign.

And that is how S. B. Hadley Wilson was born!

Best,
Hadley

At the Moment: 10 Guilty Pleasures

The term “guilty pleasure” seems like a contradiction to me because if something is devilishly joyful then why should we feel guilt? What is the definition of a guilty pleasure anyway? Is it something that we enjoy so much that we become braggarts? Is it something that we covet so much that we turn it into an addiction? Or is it something that we engage in but fear others may find it lowbrow or taboo? I do not know about you but my guilty pleasures encompass all of the above! Here are 10 of mine (in alphabetical order):

1. “All I Want For Christmas Is You”: If I were stranded on a desert island and could only bring one CD, it would be Mariah Carey’s “Merry Christmas” album for the sole purpose of “All I Want For Christmas Is You.” I love, love, love this song and do in fact play it year round. You can ask any of my friends who have been in my house or car during the winter or summer months – January, June, you name it, it will be played. This song is so cheerful, so loving – how could you not want someone to sing (or even say) this to you? I am actually smiling as I am listing to it now. :-) Click here for the goodness.

2. American Express Platinum Card: The rules of the Total Money Makeover instruct me not to use my credit card, and I follow that rule 99.7% of the time, I really truly do, but when I go to a fancy dinner I use my American Express card because I do not like to carry that much cash with me. But if I may, the American Express Platinum Card is pretty. Plain and simple. It is fun to use for show. :-) But in all seriousness, it keeps you responsible because you have to pay it off in full, and even more impressively, it has the Platinum Card Concierge service that handles restaurant reservations, assistance in travel planning, and gifts; and the representatives even provide their last names. That is how committed it is to customer service! Oh, and its Departures magazine is filled with gorgeous pictures and worthwhile lifestyle and travel information. Plus you gain access to several airport lounges around the world.

3. Dairy Queen Butterscotch dip cone: I had a butterscotch dip cone in 2009 and the last time before that was 1989. It was as heavenly as I remembered: the sweetness of butter, the honey-like color, the rich and smooth texture of the hard shell. It also reminded me of my childhood and middle school because if we had perfect attendance for a number of consecutive days (I forget how many) we were rewarded with the privilege of having an off-campus lunch and Dairy Queen was right around the corner from school. I often think about it since there is a Dairy Queen only a few blocks away from my house and there are Dairy Queens all over Minneapolis but I have will power, darn it. Thank goodness!

4. Doritos Nacho Cheese: If Jerry McGuire had Dorothy Boyd at “hello,” you could have me at “Doritos Nacho Cheese.” Is it me or is it impossible to eat only one Dorito? I love Doritos Nacho Cheese so much that I actually cannot have them in my house because I will eat the entire bag in one sitting. In fact, that has actually happened. The first time I went to the house of life-long friend Tali Light, I sat on that purple sectional in the living room watching TV and before I knew it, I ate her entire bag of full-sized Doritos Nacho Cheese. Oops.

5. Louis Vuitton: I have learned over the years that consumers are the true owners of a brand’s identity, but to be fair, a company has some control over its brand. Some choose to dilute their brands with sales to gain short-term market share or revenue, and others never discount their brands to maintain “brand integrity” (thank you very much, Louis Vuitton St. Louis Store Manager Debbie Stueckel). I have yet to ever experience a sale at Louis Vuitton; in fact, its prices have only gone up in the recent years. I LoVe Louis Vuitton as much as I love the four aforementioned guilty pleasures and as much as I love the subsequent five. Even if you buy something outside of its Monogram collection, it will still have a dominant presence on your accessory wall. The Kiowa tote that I use for traveling is amazing.

6. MICHELIN (Michelin) starred restaurants: This is my most recent guilty pleasure and it is challenging for me to talk about because I really am ignorant to the methodologies in reviewing restaurants and I am not a foodie by any means. But, I love first-time experiences and the Michelin starred restaurants on the San Francisco and New York City lists are meant to be enjoyed with those you love. My first experience was in 2009 at the French Laundry. Being there had fulfilled my America dining experience but it reminded me of when I finally saw Whitney Houston live in 1999 at the Theater at Madison Square Garden. My expectations were so high that I was nervous and skeptical. But the result was euphoric. I will be in New York City in two weeks and have the opportunity to experience Rouge Tomate, and in a few months I will be in San Francisco again and hopefully get the chance to dine at Coi (pronounced “kwah”). I am determined to eat my way through their lists.

7. Target Merona 3-pack socks: Last year in an effort to be more efficient and take out the guess work in matching my black dress socks, I threw away all of my dress socks and started over with socks that were striped, in an argyle pattern, or a colorful solid. But I did end up with one solid black pair of socks by default because they came in a 3-pack with some other styles. The Merona socks by Target are ridiculously inexpensive but stylish enough to pair with your Valentino suit.

8. “Sister Act 2”: As side from Lauryn Hill and Tanya Blount’s melodic rendition of “His Eye is on the Sparrow” and even Ms. Hill’s “Joyful Joyful,” I did not realize I had a strong affection for this movie. However, I blame my NYU roommate, Saurabh Monga, on this guilty pleasure because it was his video that we watched over and over again. Also, when I lived in St. Louis there were numerous weekend afternoons that I would lie on the sofa and watch “Sister Act 2” in its entirety. Who knew?!

9. Slatkin & Co. Bamboo & Jasmine candle: It saddens me that I am allergic to most fragrances but I could burn this candle in my house forever. It has a luxuriously fresh, welcoming scent that is above the rest and its simple packaging is so velvety. I have given this candle as gifts to many and in turn they have gifted it, as well.

10. Whitney Houston: I fell in love with her back in 1985 when I was 10 years old and still love her. To this day, it is not uncommon for me to listen to all her albums on shuffle, on repeat, on my iPod throughout the weekend. We all can read about her history but none of that affects me nor do I find any of it that interesting actually. By no means does it adulterate my adoration for her. My top 10 songs of hers are:

“All the Man That I Need”
“A Song for You”
“The Greatest Love of All”
“I Didn’t Know My Own Strength”
“I Have Nothing”
“I Will Always Love You”
“One Moment in Time”
“Try It On My Own”
“Until You Come Back”
“You Light Up My Life”

And of course, her rendition of “The Star Spangled Banner” is brill.

At the Moment: Personal Mission Statements

Performance reviews are brilliant things. For some, they are fabulous. For others, not so much. Good or bad, they serve as a reminder that our perceptions are our own reality. But this time during the self-evaluation process, I was able to (off the record) commit a personal mission statement to my performance review, my center, and my purpose, both professionally and personally.

I found creating my personal mission statement to be a cathartic experience. It provided self-discovery, is unique to me, and constitutes my values, vision, and purpose. However, it will evolve.


My Personal Mission Statement

Overall Statement of My Life’s Mission
“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” – George Bernard Shaw

My life’s mission is to come upon my undiscovered talents that best bring about perfection in the material and spiritual worlds, as well as be a giving and loving person in my important relationships and even in those that may extend beyond my immediate circle.


My Guide
“I do not try to dance better than anyone else. I only try to dance better than myself.” – Mikhail Baryshnikov

I believe that where I am right now is the right place for me to be; this does not suggest I take a passive role in my life.


Important Relationships
“To handle yourself, use your head. To handle others, use your heart.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

Partner: The relationship with my partner shall be of mutual respect and where I can love and differentiate between that which is satisfactory and that which is perfect.

Child/Next Generation: Believe it or not, I do enjoy children, even though I talk to them as I talk to you. So until I have a child of my own, I extend myself to my nieces, nephew and Godson any way that I can but wish that I were physically closer to celebrate their birthdays, holidays, and special occasions with them.

Parents: I love all of my parents. I warmly welcome their unconditional love and advice. You would be surprised how right they are most of the time, but if you repeat that, I will deny it. :-) I shall continue to work toward transitioning our parent-child relationships into adult-adult relationships.

Siblings: I could afford to strengthen my relationships with my two sisters (on my father’s side) and brother (on my late mother’s side). Presently, my knowledge of the events in each of their respective lives remains at a high-level.

Friends: My friends are an extension of my family. I love to converse and explore new things with them, will always offer to bring them chicken soup if they are sick, and work harder to not be heavy-handed with advice.

Employer: I will use the power of communication, industriousness, and efficiency to get my work done and rise to any challenge, hopefully whilst ensuring that my goals and values are aligned with the mission, vision, and values of my employer.

Community: In August 2007, I moved to Minneapolis but have yet to engage in volunteer opportunities within the health and/or arts communities. I look forward to resuming my volunteering efforts upon the completion of graduate school.


Learning
“Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

I consider myself a work in progress and a love of learning assists in my quest for self-improvement. By keeping an open mind and appreciating thoughtful academic research, well scripted television banter, provocative articles, friendly social networking sites, books of interest, and smart and funny conversations during hours of happiness, I hope to have a more tolerant, imaginative, and positive approach to my life, personally, socially, and professionally.


Self-Esteem and Security
“Be yourself. There is something that you can do better than any other. Listen to the inward voice and bravely obey that.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

There are many ups and downs in life but as the above quote says, there is something that I can do better than anyone else. Now it is just a matter of inducing this competitive advantage and sustaining it.

I derive my worth from the quality of my relationships, the material and spiritual things in my life, and knowing that I have faith – all of which are measurable by my smile. I try my hardest not to compare myself to others since we are different persons with different experiences; but that is usually not the case, therefore, I seek to turn insecurities into opportunities or discard them as irrelevant.


Strength
“Anger is only one letter short of danger.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

Two primary sources where I draw strength to achieve my life’s mission are from the feedback and interactions with my family, friends, and colleagues, and the ideas that challenge my existing way of thinking. Also, by being versatile in my communications with others and sympathetic to my surroundings, I can learn to be less demanding of myself and others – decreasing the disappointment when my demands are not met and reducing the potential for pessimism.


My Personal Mission Statement and My Daily Life

“The success of any great moral enterprise does not depend upon numbers.” – William Lloyd Garrison

It is through my daily observation, insight, and capacity that I try to apply conscientious care to all aspects of my life. The life choices I have made have contributed to my current way of thinking and approach to life, albeit right or wrong in the opinions of others. But part of my life’s mission knows that as an educated individual, it is my responsibility to give back to the community not only monetarily or by volunteering but also by working for a company to improve and sustain its ethical standards.

So I leave you now with the challenge to create your own personal mission statement. You never know, it may just help you keep the end in mind. You can find samples and templates online but you will be pleased with how yours reflects your own uniqueness. Good luck!

Best,
Hadley

At the Moment: Winter Reads

Winters are the perfect time for me to catch up on summer reads, especially since the weather here in Minneapolis is predictably murky with below-zero temperatures to snowfalls of 10 feet. (Boo!) So for the last couple of winters, I have found great pleasure when chilling out in front of the fireplace while listening to Sergei Rachmaninov or Die Zauberflöte (and, I shall not lie, equally played on my iPod are Alicia Keys and Lady Gaga) and reading about astrology, management, or personal finance.

Now, I know personal finance is not romantic by any means, so I have asked a couple friends to share some of their favorite winter reads. But this past December I developed a love for books about personal finance, which is perfectly in sync with the philosophy of my favorite chiropractor and dear friend, Eric Peay: “Smart gays finish rich!” Ha! Perhaps David Bach has his next book?!

Anyhow, Eric’s and my friends, human resources rising star Cole and his fashionista wife Jocely Bowman, introduced me to The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey, and let me just say – this book has changed my life. Mr. Ramsey’s The Total Money Makeover provides seven baby steps which are unbelievably believable. It changed my paradigm on how to tackle debt and set realistic goals. I physically felt the downward spiral shift upward.

Some of the other books I recently read are Financial Peace by Dave Ramsey, The Seven 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen. R. Covey, and Stop Acting Rich by Thomas J. Stanley.

Then, there is The Hours by Michael Cunningham. This book is fabulous: three women, three stories, one choice. Each time I read it, it feels like I am reading it for the first time. I was introduced to it in 1999 and have had an affection for it ever since. (And the movie is equally as delicious.)

But currently, I am reading, err, skimming, The Secret Language of Destiny by Gary Goldschneider & Joost Elffers. This is 824 pages of pure enjoyment for those who believe in astrology and want (a refresher) to find their life purpose. And for you skeptics, do not knock astrology until you have tried it!

Now, the first friend to provide some recs is Peter Nguyen, a lawyer-turning-interior designer in San Francisco and the Edina to my Patsy. He and his partner Grant Kalinowski are unanimously “my fanciest friends.” He has introduced me to the fabulousness of lunching at the world famous French Laundry and then hours later enjoying spicy vegetarian Sloppy Joes, tater tots, and wedge salads in candlelight on the deck of their country house in Sonoma. His diversity is inspiring, and his choices are:

Marie Antoinette: The Journey by Antonia Fraiser. Peter said “it is like being at the Court of Versaille and that Ms. Fraiser’s historical research is impressive but her writing is engaging and approachable.” As someone who loves royalty, well, Queen Elizabeth I, I cannot wait to read this!

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies by Jane Austen. Peter said for all you Austen geeks, this is a silly one!

Another friend I solicited recs from is Kathryn Frankson, my go-to Minneapolitan who has more energy than most people will have in their lifetime. (Her love of the group fitness classes at Life Time Fitness is unmatched.) Although Kathryn has provided her recs below, I need to take a moment to take full responsibility for her new-fangled appreciation for astrology, a topic that she was once quite skeptical about. (My perseverance paid off!) Kathryn reads The Secret Language of Birthdays by Gary Goldschneider & Joost Elffers like it is a novel. Her commitment to being informed, engaged, and empowered is impressive, and her choices are:

BOOM! by Tom Brokaw. Kathryn found Mr. Brokaw to be “accurate and succinct” with the details of the 1960s. She felt that Mr. Brokaw’s use of personal stories and connections “really take you beyond the surface and offer a deeper look at this lasting impact” of this formative decade.

Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott. Kathryn said Ms. Lamott’s writing was “hysterical, interesting, and self-deprecating.” She felt it provided “critical insights for writers and small, simple life truths that we can all enjoy.” I concur! I read this book in 2003 and have a copy of it if anyone wants to borrow it.

And my last friend to suggest a winter read is Erin Murdock, a lifelong friend still living in St. Louis and the mother of the nicest young man, my godson. She is an undiscovered talent who needs to be published. Her writing is intuitive and warm; both characteristics she exhibits in how she handles her friendships, as well. You can always rely on Erin to be insightful and courageous in telling you the truth. I keep telling her to write a book; the world would benefit from it. Erin’s choice is:

A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose by Eckhart Tolle. Erin found this to be “an intriguing read … it succeeded in raising your awareness and awakens your spirit.” (Perhaps Erin should also read The Secret Language of Destiny!) She stresses, though, that “each chapter requires thoughtful attention, and perhaps, meditation.” This definitely sounds like my type of book. Namaste!

Well, that is all that I have for now, friends. Hope you have a great week and Valentine’s Day!

Best,
Hadley